a summer night, a perfect kiss, a hopeless love...

Hello lovelies and Merry Christmas two days late. i hope you all are on winter vacation and are enjoying yourselves because you deserve it. I'm afraid this vacation has been full of ups and downs for me. Dealing with things of months past and realizing my childhood is slowly falling away. The best years of my life were spent in Florida with Addie and I am so grateful. People would probably say i feel to much, i care too much, i hold on way too long, and I can't bring myself to let go of the dearest things in my heart. I know people my age think that I am weird and  odd for being who I am. I just would rather keep to myself than be with those awful mean people who think they are so wonderful. If I ever wanted to be the slightest popular, I would have to change myself and I am not willing. Never would I alter who I am becoming to be well liked by people whose opinions don't matter.
I was up extremely late last night scribbling away. I couldn't help myself because the words just wouldn't cease to flow from my fingertips.  Here is a story for you to read, a story of us, a small story of me.

Hearts and Confessions   

She looked at him and in that moment, she was filled with wonder and a need for escape into a new world. It was a slow ache that began when her hand touched his fingers intertwined, promising a kiss, this only the prelude. It was summer and possibility was in the air. Warm, brown eyes and a pretty smile, she closed her eyes as she memorized this elapse of time for she would hold it in her hands forever. A pink tie and a gray suit. A sleeveless, blue as sky dress.
"Remember. Always remember this night." She thought, eyes still shut.

 She opened them and saw black sky and stars that twinkled as if urging her never to forget. The moon, full and milky white, put the spotlight directly on her as the boy looked back, doubt in his eyes.
"Don't let us go." He told her gently through the clear glass of the doors separating them. He could feel her kiss on his lips.
His expression forlorn, she could feel their love, their night, their forever slipping from her grasp like quicksilver. She closed her eyes and could feel his touch once more. Recapture the butterflies and the free nature of their starry night. For she wouldn't, couldn't believe what they had told her of him. "No," she thought, "Those perfect curls and that charming smile. Not him. No, not him." Denial set in like fear does as it crawls under your skin, staying uninvited and much too long. She, stupid girl, pushed away all realistic thought, settling for fantasies and kisses and intense gazes across the room. "No, no, not him. " she thought. Because he was hers at least for one night and that, my dear was... is all.  
She felt her wings grow as he kissed her hair. She was flying, soaring above where no one could reach her. The falseness of infatuation gripped her, unforgiving when it picked her up and as it threw her down. Regret is an ugly creature that lives at the back of the mind to gnaw and eat at one's sanity. She felt lost as infatuation and manipulation handed her to regret and his brother sorrow. A sad tale that hurt more than the initial ache she felt for him as their eyes caught at the beginning of the night. 
Stupid, idiot girl. She handed him the silver keys to her heart when he asked simply. Thought not upon his request, she gave him her vulnerability as well trusting, too trusting. Good intentions, maybe so, but two young people are hardly equipped to handle emotions such as these reasonably, sensibly at first.  So she gave him a perfect kiss and for this he attempted to sequester her heart and claim it his. 
"Ooh," She moaned the next day. Cloudy, not a bit of sunshine as encouragement to aid her through. He lit up her touch screen with messages pulling at her heartstrings. Hot tears descended down her face as she told him her goodbyes. He pleaded, he begged her to listen, not to set their love free to move on like a cloud just passing through. It was too much to bear.
But she took a vow that she never forget the free, fearless nature with which she accidently caught his notice. 
For it was the first time she lived that night. As he held her hand in his, she could feel the longing in his touch of never letting go. The passion they shared was undeniable. She sat alone on a bumpy bus ride and reminisced in a summer dress as the wind whipped across her face. Her still broken heart in jagged fragments, she smiled in spite.  She'd let him go, he'd gotten away, he was back to doing the same damn thing again. She was just another bright feather is his hat, a meaningless girl that gave up her heart too freely.
It wore her strength down as cousins guilt and regret urged her to meet their good friend depression. She tried to fight.Yet as the months fly away into the endless sky, she still remembers fondly of the love that lasted one day as it took her breath away.

She whispers to the wind, "Forever and always."