Saturday, February 4, 2012

The Land of Enchantment.


Yes.  You can get that on record.  I have just called New Mexico home.  

Oh goodness.  What has happened to me?  

This time two years ago, I would have kicked myself for saying that.  Chances are I would've done so even one year ago.  I hated it when I lived there.  I was tired of the browns of the desert, the long dry summers, the  cold snowy winters, the run down neighborhoods.  I was tired of the big blue sky, the spicy green chilie peppers, even the turquoise.  

I moved to Perfectville, California.  It's nice.  I can walk to the beach.  The land is green.  No one here looks like they'd want to steal my purse as soon as I leave it.  People here all seem to lead perfect lives to go along with their perfect town.  Perfect grades, perfect clothes, perfect houses, perfect bodies, perfect everything.  I should be thankful that I live here.  It's such a nice place.  People are nice.  The weather is nice. Everyone who lives here seems to be in love with it.  I feel bad for hating it, thinking that I'm just going to want to come back when I leave.  But yet I don't feel like I belong here.  I feel like an outcast.  The imperfect figure in the town of perfect-ness.  

It's easy to get sick of perfect.  

Now, I miss those hot, dry summers. I think the brown mountains and blue skies are beautiful.  I can appreciate the snowy winters and even the run down neighborhoods now because there aren't any here.  And I definitely miss having turquoise-wearing waiters and waitresses asking me "red or green?" after ordering food.  

I have such great memories there.  When I got to New Mexico, I was just an innocent little 13 year old girl.  I was just sure that one day I would be a writer.  I had dreams of going to high school and living my life just like a Taylor Swift music video.  I thought I knew exactly who I was... and well, everything else.  But I spent a year in solitude... though I didn't like it at the time, it gave me a better sense of not being afraid to be myself.  I started high school and met some wonderful people.  Suddenly I found myself not hating New Mexico so much.  Those people and events gave me an even better idea of who I was and made me grow up... I remember leaving our little adobe house and thinking "Wow.  I'm a different person than I was when I first entered that house."  It felt good.  I felt more... real.  

Today I heard that the morning radio show I listened to everyday when I lived there was cancelled.  I just about cried.  To me, it was just symbolic of how good those days were, and how that they're really over now.  

I still feel like an outsider here in California.  I'll be sitting in chemistry and think "Do I really go to school here?  What am I even doing here?  I don't belong here..."  

I live in Perfectville, where I would have killed to live just two years ago.  It's black and white, nothing ever goes wrong.  
But life needs some color.  And of the seven totally different places I've lived, New Mexico is the most colorful.  
You've got to see the black and white before you can appreciate the color.  

Oh, what'd I'd give to go back.

Even if you just want to leave while you're there, you'll always be drawn back in.

And that's why they call it the Land of Enchantment.  

Tuesday, January 24, 2012


I was tagged by the lovely : Maddy Beth. Her blog is gorgeous so please go take a look at it!

the rules:

1) post these rules
2) you must post 11 random things about yourself
3) answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post
4) create 11 new questions for the people you tag to answer
5) go to their blog and tell them they've been tagged
6) no stuff in the tagging section about you are tagged if you are reading this/follow me' blah blah blah, you have to legitimately tag people
the questions
1) What is your favorite food&drink? Salted Caramel Mochas or English tea. My ultimate favorite food is probably french fries. Any time, anywhere, always.
 2) Favorite Color(s)? I love love love the color turquoise. I've been obsessed for a long time
3)QUICK! First word that pops into your head? Typewriter! I don't why, but I've always wanted a vintage one.


4)Favorite TV show? There are so many! if i narrowed it down to one it would be Once Upon a Time. Its highly addictive.

5) What can you not live without? My family
6)Most important thing you carry around with you is ____? My iPhone and my chapstick
7) Video Games or Apps? Apps.
8) Stuffed Animal or Blankie? My Pooh Bear baby blankie! 

9) Favorite Book/Author? Right now, my favorite book is The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. can't wait for the movie! TEAM PEETA!
10) What's the best time you've ever had with a friend? Addie and I have had countless best times, but one of my favorites is the time we stayed up until 5 am just enjoying each other's company when I was 9 and she was 11. 
11) Nicest thing someone has done for you recently? A mean girl made a snide comment about what I was wearing behind my back. One of my good friends took up for me :)

11 things
 1. I love Taylor Swift and her music.
2. I play piano and have for a couple of years.
3. I love to write. Its a passion Addie and I share. 
4. I have many nicknames.
5.  I love spring and summer.
6. I have terrible, horrible eyesight so I wear contacts religiously. 
7) I wrote a song called "My Confession" and preformed it for my school 
8) I love high heels
9) Photography is one of my obsessions
10) Addie and I have been best friends for five years
11) I made a wish on 11/11/11 at 11:11. 
 your questions
1) What is your favorite song?
2) Who is your favorite artist?
3) Name a hobby or passion you have?
4) Favorite quote?
5) Are you athletic, artistic, or both?
6) One of your favorite movies?
7) Do you have a lucky number? What is it?
8) What is your favorite season?
9) Do you have curly hair, straight, or in the middle?
10) Dogs or cats?
11) If you had one wish, what would it be?

Hope you all are having a lovely week :)

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Stories of Forever

Throughout life, we learn new things everyday. In the beginning, we are naive novices, unsuspecting of everything and everyone. Then we get hurt, burned, scarred and we put up a guard, a wall. We protect ourselves. We become afraid, fearful of the new. We forget that we have one chance to live. We don't take those oppurtunities, we push away change, and sometimes we are too afraid of life to actually live. Its the challenge we face everyday.
But in the end, we will all be stories floating about in the wind and living forever. 
 So what do you wish yours to be be?